Comments on: My One-Time Rebuttal to My “Deserved Rape” Article: Idealism vs. Reality http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/2008/10/30/my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality Deciphering the Enigma that is Life Wed, 03 Mar 2010 17:49:45 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: When things are right « Really? Law? http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/2008/10/30/my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality/comment-page-1/#comment-587 When things are right « Really? Law? Wed, 06 Jan 2010 14:58:11 +0000 http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/?p=37#comment-587 [...] we often blame the victim for the assault. We do. We do. We do. We do (followed by the even worse We Do). I think we all know that we [...] [...] we often blame the victim for the assault. We do. We do. We do. We do (followed by the even worse We Do). I think we all know that we [...]

]]> By: Larz http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/2008/10/30/my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality/comment-page-1/#comment-461 Larz Sun, 28 Jun 2009 17:21:52 +0000 http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/?p=37#comment-461 Wow alot of people bash this guy probably because they don't read the entire article...or don't even read it at all. What he is saying makes perfect sense! In no way is he suggesting that women should be controlled, enslaved, or used as sex objects. He is infact warning women to not display themselves as sex objects. What he was saying about the woman he describes is that she was teasing him with sexual actions that both parties view differently. For her, she just does it for fun. For him, he interprets it as the woman likes him and enjoys his company (Which is a completely natural interpretation! not some sick rapist way of thinking). When she rejects his kiss he will obviously get anoyed because of the misleading scenario. She acted like she wanted him yet she deceived him. Most men would just head back to the bar and ignore the situation but SOME as he states may have a few problems and take out their anger on the woman with rape. So, basically he has put up a big warning sign saying that while acting like a sex object may be fun for women, some men may get the wrong idea and will think you are one instead of acting as one. Now, I know tons of women would probably say that the woman in his scenario was just having some innocent fun...but lets face it, our society DISPLAYS women as sex objects. The ads the media sprays at us show women dressed in...well not clothes...closer to pieces of shredded cloth! This encourages young women like my daughter to dress this way, a way that CLEARLY lances out into any average male mind saying "LOOK AT MY EXPOSED PRIVATE PARTS, I AM SEXY ARN't I?" Society has brainwashed women of mostly a young age to think that in order to find love they most submit to men and dress to look like a prostitute. If society does not change the way it influences our young ones then in the near future it might be common place to be a victim of sexual assualt. Wow alot of people bash this guy probably because they don’t read the entire article…or don’t even read it at all. What he is saying makes perfect sense! In no way is he suggesting that women should be controlled, enslaved, or used as sex objects. He is infact warning women to not display themselves as sex objects. What he was saying about the woman he describes is that she was teasing him with sexual actions that both parties view differently. For her, she just does it for fun. For him, he interprets it as the woman likes him and enjoys his company (Which is a completely natural interpretation! not some sick rapist way of thinking). When she rejects his kiss he will obviously get anoyed because of the misleading scenario. She acted like she wanted him yet she deceived him. Most men would just head back to the bar and ignore the situation but SOME as he states may have a few problems and take out their anger on the woman with rape. So, basically he has put up a big warning sign saying that while acting like a sex object may be fun for women, some men may get the wrong idea and will think you are one instead of acting as one. Now, I know tons of women would probably say that the woman in his scenario was just having some innocent fun…but lets face it, our society DISPLAYS women as sex objects. The ads the media sprays at us show women dressed in…well not clothes…closer to pieces of shredded cloth! This encourages young women like my daughter to dress this way, a way that CLEARLY lances out into any average male mind saying “LOOK AT MY EXPOSED PRIVATE PARTS, I AM SEXY ARN’t I?” Society has brainwashed women of mostly a young age to think that in order to find love they most submit to men and dress to look like a prostitute. If society does not change the way it influences our young ones then in the near future it might be common place to be a victim of sexual assualt.

]]> By: L http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/2008/10/30/my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality/comment-page-1/#comment-436 L Sat, 23 May 2009 21:25:50 +0000 http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/?p=37#comment-436 Aaron, I am a victim of a sexual assault. And I find that I completely agree with you. Our society is completely over-sexed, to the point that some women, as you said in your article, find it fun to go out and tease men at a bar or a club. Music, television, movies, magazines- the media in general, project an image that for men to want women they need to dress in a certain way and act just so for men to want them. A woman is then shocked when, after dressing for sex and teasing men, she is assaulted. Perhaps we, as a collective society, need to re-address what we find acceptable and "fun" in society? This being said, I think anyone who actually read the article knows you don't agree with rapists, and that you don't condone rape. I agree that a woman has the right to say no at any point, but I also think women shouldn't be teasing men and expecting every single person to be good and accept no for an answer. The reality is, 1 of 5 women will experience a sexual assault in their lifetime. Not every woman in the world, but a significant portion of them will face rape or molestation. I think that your post was more a "be careful and consider your actions" than a rant condoning rapists. Keep writing, it's insightful and funny as hell. -L Aaron,

I am a victim of a sexual assault. And I find that I completely agree with you.

Our society is completely over-sexed, to the point that some women, as you said in your article, find it fun to go out and tease men at a bar or a club. Music, television, movies, magazines- the media in general, project an image that for men to want women they need to dress in a certain way and act just so for men to want them. A woman is then shocked when, after dressing for sex and teasing men, she is assaulted. Perhaps we, as a collective society, need to re-address what we find acceptable and “fun” in society?

This being said, I think anyone who actually read the article knows you don’t agree with rapists, and that you don’t condone rape. I agree that a woman has the right to say no at any point, but I also think women shouldn’t be teasing men and expecting every single person to be good and accept no for an answer.

The reality is, 1 of 5 women will experience a sexual assault in their lifetime. Not every woman in the world, but a significant portion of them will face rape or molestation.

I think that your post was more a “be careful and consider your actions” than a rant condoning rapists.

Keep writing, it’s insightful and funny as hell.

-L

]]> By: Mary Madden http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/2008/10/30/my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality/comment-page-1/#comment-433 Mary Madden Fri, 22 May 2009 14:05:34 +0000 http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/?p=37#comment-433 Aaron, as a woman who has been raped....(wait for it)... I totally agree with you. Women in our culture have been socialized to embrace being a victim. It is almost as fulfilling as that 'ego-stroking' you referred to earlier. Just in a different way. I don't think I deserved to be raped, but you know what? I fully understand how and why it happened. I would go so far as to say that it was mostly my fault. (Here's an analogy you can use if you care to): If I happen upon some dynamite, and, being a fairly intelligent member of the species, KNOW that it is dangerous when exposed to flame, but start fiddling with the fuse in a rather pyro-maniacal sort of way, can I really blame the dynamite for the resulting explosion? Women these days are so utterly confused it disgusts me. The above posters give rape 'victims'(if we MUST use that word) a bad name. Kudos to you for attempting to straighten them out. :) Aaron, as a woman who has been raped….(wait for it)…
I totally agree with you. Women in our culture have been socialized to embrace being a victim. It is almost as fulfilling as that ‘ego-stroking’ you referred to earlier. Just in a different way.
I don’t think I deserved to be raped, but you know what? I fully understand how and why it happened. I would go so far as to say that it was mostly my fault. (Here’s an analogy you can use if you care to):

If I happen upon some dynamite, and, being a fairly intelligent member of the species, KNOW that it is dangerous when exposed to flame, but start fiddling with the fuse in a rather pyro-maniacal sort of way, can I really blame the dynamite for the resulting explosion?

Women these days are so utterly confused it disgusts me. The above posters give rape ‘victims’(if we MUST use that word) a bad name. Kudos to you for attempting to straighten them out. :)

]]> By: Miss Quitter http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/2008/10/30/my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality/comment-page-1/#comment-429 Miss Quitter Thu, 21 May 2009 19:48:05 +0000 http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/?p=37#comment-429 Mr. Taylor, Thank you for sharing your views. I must say that my absolute favorite thing about your blog is how you do not let the facts get in the way of your opinion. I'm sorry, but as a victim of rape, you sure do remind me of the man who attacked me. Have you ever considered forcing yourself upon someone? It sure seems that there have been instances when you could have done so, and thought that the girl entirely deserved it. If I were you, I might consult a professional to discuss theses urges, or perhaps commit myself, as to prevent dangers to others. It is people like YOU that make getting over sexual assault a difficult process. Victims of such tend to blame themselves and this just adds fuel to those thoughts. According to you, I entirely deserved what happened. I was friendly to the rapists, meaning I treated him like a human-being. Despite him holding me down, choking me, and bruising my body while I screamed for help, I should have just accepted it. That is sick. Think before you speak. This just confirms the fact that the anonymity of the internet lures out the scumbags. Thoroughly Disgusted, Miss Quitter Mr. Taylor,

Thank you for sharing your views. I must say that my absolute favorite thing about your blog is how you do not let the facts get in the way of your opinion.

I’m sorry, but as a victim of rape, you sure do remind me of the man who attacked me. Have you ever considered forcing yourself upon someone? It sure seems that there have been instances when you could have done so, and thought that the girl entirely deserved it. If I were you, I might consult a professional to discuss theses urges, or perhaps commit myself, as to prevent dangers to others.

It is people like YOU that make getting over sexual assault a difficult process. Victims of such tend to blame themselves and this just adds fuel to those thoughts. According to you, I entirely deserved what happened. I was friendly to the rapists, meaning I treated him like a human-being. Despite him holding me down, choking me, and bruising my body while I screamed for help, I should have just accepted it. That is sick. Think before you speak.

This just confirms the fact that the anonymity of the internet lures out the scumbags.

Thoroughly Disgusted,
Miss Quitter

]]> By: GrammarGirl http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/2008/10/30/my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality/comment-page-1/#comment-428 GrammarGirl Thu, 21 May 2009 19:36:34 +0000 http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/?p=37#comment-428 I am a fan of neither rape apologists, nor people who believe that women need to keep themselves from being raped but mostly I am not a fan of people who try to make points while using inaccurate grammar. While you were at the club your friends and you were shocked. To use the first person, "my friends and I were shocked." An easy rule is to think how you would say the sentence if you were simply speaking about yourself. You would say, "I was shocked" not "me was shocked." Please be sure the next time you share your ideas about what women should and should not be doing you are grammatically correct. Thank you. I am a fan of neither rape apologists, nor people who believe that women need to keep themselves from being raped but mostly I am not a fan of people who try to make points while using inaccurate grammar.

While you were at the club your friends and you were shocked. To use the first person, “my friends and I were shocked.”

An easy rule is to think how you would say the sentence if you were simply speaking about yourself. You would say, “I was shocked” not “me was shocked.”

Please be sure the next time you share your ideas about what women should and should not be doing you are grammatically correct.

Thank you.

]]> By: Gregory A. Butler http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/2008/10/30/my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality/comment-page-1/#comment-400 Gregory A. Butler Mon, 20 Apr 2009 05:56:10 +0000 http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/?p=37#comment-400 One other point. Aaron - I've been in situations on occasion where I've had hot women in skimpy clothing rubbing over me in a seductive way. And, as it happened, in some of these situations, those women didn't want to have sex with me. Know what I did? Enjoyed the hell out of the opportunity to rub on a beautiful young lady's body for as long as it lasted. Walked away feeling refreshed and energized. Went home and masturbated. And was able to use the experience as material for j.o. fantasies from then on. That's how a REAL MAN deals with being sexually stimulated by a woman who doesn't want to have sex. REAL MEN DON'T RAPE. They have self control. Are we clear here, or do you need me to draw a diagram for you? One other point.

Aaron – I’ve been in situations on occasion where I’ve had hot women in skimpy clothing rubbing over me in a seductive way.

And, as it happened, in some of these situations, those women didn’t want to have sex with me.

Know what I did?

Enjoyed the hell out of the opportunity to rub on a beautiful young lady’s body for as long as it lasted.

Walked away feeling refreshed and energized.

Went home and masturbated.

And was able to use the experience as material for j.o. fantasies from then on.

That’s how a REAL MAN deals with being sexually stimulated by a woman who doesn’t want to have sex.

REAL MEN DON’T RAPE.

They have self control.

Are we clear here, or do you need me to draw a diagram for you?

]]> By: Gregory A. Butler http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/2008/10/30/my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality/comment-page-1/#comment-399 Gregory A. Butler Mon, 20 Apr 2009 05:50:52 +0000 http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/?p=37#comment-399 Rational Reader and IndianGuy - see my advice to Aaron, it applies to you too, and to all rape apologists! You are an embarrassment to my gender - and, on behalf of the 3 billion men on planet Earth, I am asking you to leave the male gender, as soon as possible (it only takes a sharp pair of scissors - in your cases, a very SMALL pair of scissors, or perhaps even toenail clippers, should get the job done!) Rational Reader and IndianGuy – see my advice to Aaron, it applies to you too, and to all rape apologists!

You are an embarrassment to my gender – and, on behalf of the 3 billion men on planet Earth, I am asking you to leave the male gender, as soon as possible (it only takes a sharp pair of scissors – in your cases, a very SMALL pair of scissors, or perhaps even toenail clippers, should get the job done!)

]]> By: Gregory A. Butler http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/2008/10/30/my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality/comment-page-1/#comment-398 Gregory A. Butler Mon, 20 Apr 2009 05:46:11 +0000 http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/?p=37#comment-398 Aaron, Sexist rape-culture morons like you are the reason that strip clubs have to hire 300 lb men as bouncers! Are you not aware that women are human beings with autonomy - they are not satellites orbiting around your penis? If you do not know that, consider yourself informed! You are a true douchebag, and an embarrassment to the entire male gender! If you cannot control your penis and testes, may I suggest amputation? Aaron,

Sexist rape-culture morons like you are the reason that strip clubs have to hire 300 lb men as bouncers!

Are you not aware that women are human beings with autonomy – they are not satellites orbiting around your penis?

If you do not know that, consider yourself informed!

You are a true douchebag, and an embarrassment to the entire male gender!

If you cannot control your penis and testes, may I suggest amputation?

]]> By: Alexandra Erin http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/2008/10/30/my-one-time-rebuttal-to-my-deserved-rape-article-idealism-vs-reality/comment-page-1/#comment-394 Alexandra Erin Sun, 12 Apr 2009 16:48:27 +0000 http://emqtv.com/blog/uncommonsense/?p=37#comment-394 "Rational Reader" and Aaron need only look at IndianGuy's comment of agreement to understand why people are acting like they're misogynistic caveman rape apologists. This is what you've aligned yourself with, Aaron. This is the side you've chosen. “Rational Reader” and Aaron need only look at IndianGuy’s comment of agreement to understand why people are acting like they’re misogynistic caveman rape apologists.

This is what you’ve aligned yourself with, Aaron. This is the side you’ve chosen.

]]>