Ignore Her Dating Rules (They Wouldn’t Matter if You Were Famous)…

Over the years, I’ve had many conversations with women about their dating lives.  When asked about the type of guys they’d like to date, I usually get a list of items their ideal guy must have before she decides to proceed.

Some of these items are pretty standard – must have a good job, able to pay his bills on time, has his own place – while other items seem absurd (i.e. must have a car – what if he likes taking the bus/train?  Must know how to cook – what if he earns enough money to order delivery food everyday?)

The one thing I notice about all these things women say, however, is this: when a guy comes along that they’re REALLY feeling, almost ALL of those items she said she wanted go right out the window!

This presents an interesting problem for a single guy.  On the one hand, if he runs into a woman he likes and tries to woo her, he fears not being able to have her as a result of breaking some rule she had that he may not have even known about.  On the other hand, single guys have close girl friends who they see dating guys that don’t have or do ANY of the things she may have told him she needed in a dating partner.

Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys!  Wake up, men! 

If you’re trying to impress a woman by following her list of standards, I got news for you: you will either (a) never get that woman, or (b) you will get that women and eventually LOSE her!

Why, you ask?  Because these rules that women set forth for their dating lives are arbitrary.  As easily as she creates them, she can just as easily get rid of the ones that aren’t allowing her to get with a guy she finds attractive.  Yes, that means if she actually LIKES you, that rule she has about dating guys who aren’t messy will be removed so she can date your sloppy behind!

“But Aaron,” you ask, “all the girls I try to get with swear up and down that their dating rules HAVE to be followed!”

Oh really? Do they, now?  And you actually BELIEVED them? 

Here’s the question you should ask yourself the next time a woman tells you some ridiculous dating rule she has:

IF I WERE (insert the name of her favorite crush-worthy male celebrity – all women have at least one), WOULD HER DATING RULE MATTER?

In other words, if it weren’t YOU that were hitting on her, but a high-earning celebrity instead, how important would her dating rules be?

Let’s look at a few well-known dating rules women have, and see why they would not matter were she dating her ultimate catch:

1. DATING RULE: A MAN SHOULD ALWAYS CALL A WOMAN THE NEXT DAY, OR THE DAY AFTER, GETTING HER PHONE NUMBER

Ah, yes, we’ve all heard this one before.  I used to fall for it, too – you think, “man, if I don’t call her right away, she’ll lose all interest in me, or even forget my name!”

But think about this, men: how many girls have you called the next day, or the day after, and they either (a) don’t remember your name, or (b) weren’t really interested in seeing you? 

It’s because you MOVED TOO FAST, EINSTEIN!  By calling her right away, you showed her you were desperate, and women hate dating men who show desperation. 

I usually tell men to wait at least 5 days before they call.  Of course, panic usually sets in – “What if she forgets me, or is mad I didn’t call right away?!?” 

But again, think back to the question.  What if T.I. got her number, then waited even 2 weeks to call her? What would she do when he finally called?  Would she be all upset like,

Thanks for finally calling, T.I., but you didn’t call me within 2 days of getting my number, so I don’t want to talk to you anymore – and don’t call here again!

Or, would she be more like this:

OMG, OMG, OMG!! You called!  I’m SOOOO glad you called me!  How are you?!?  Where are you?!? Can we go fly somewhere in your jet?!?

Notice how she wouldn’t even bring up the fact that it’s been 2 weeks?  Hmm, maybe it’s because, when a girl REALLY likes a guy, it doesn’t matter how long it takes him to call, so long as he eventually calls!

(And as for the whole “forgetting who you are” bit, that’s bullcrap – I have girls’ numbers I got YEARS ago whose names I still remember. If she’s forgetting you after less than a week, she didn’t really like you in the first place!)

2. DATING RULE: A MAN SHOULD HAVE HIS OWN PLACE.

I’m all for a guy having his own place prior to him dating someone.  It shows responsibility, and an ability to support one’s self.

But don’t get it twisted, gentlemen: it is NOT a prerequisite for dating a woman, especially one who REALLY likes you. 

After I graduated college, I was depressed for a minute because I figured my dating life would be down the tubes.  Yet, lo and behold, I actually went on quite a few dates, despite the fact that I didn’t have my own place.  Furthermore, while I was at college, there were plenty of girl friends of mine who were dating guys that were still living in their mom’s basement.

But again, if a woman gives you the ol’ “guy I’m dating must have his own place” excuse, ask yourself: If Denzel Washington had to move back home for a while to help out his dear old mom (because she prefers her house as opposed to his big mansion), would this same girl pass him up, or decide that she could deal with it?  I’ll let you decide that one…

3. DATING RULE: HE MUST BE (INSERT HEIGHT REQUIREMENT) OR (INSERT WEIGHT REQUIREMENT).

Everytime I hear a woman sprout off about how she can only date guys a certain weight or size, I burst out laughing.  Why?  Because I KNOW they are BSing me AND themselves!

Oh sure, she might have an ideal size ratio that she’d PREFER her man to have – but again, it’s stupid for a guy to think he doesn’t have a shot at her just because her mouth is telling him a “rule” she made up!

Again, think back to the question.  Remember when Ja Rule had a string of hits on the radio?  This dude is barely 5 feet tall – yet, lo and behold, not only is he married, but he was getting action from women of ALL different sizes, both shorter AND taller than him! 

In fact, most rappers/singers/actors are usually average height or SHORTER.  Yet, despite this, they manage to have a line of females following them up and down the block!  Do you think a woman who’s six feet tall is going to turn down a tryst with Nelly just because he’s 6 inches shorter than she is? HA!

My point, gentleman, is that when you ask a woman out, and she says you’re not meeting some moronic right of passage she’s set up, don’t believe it.  It’s just her nice way of saying, “YOU are not the one I want to date.”  Instead, go out and find someone else who actually wants to be with you.  Remember: those rules wouldn’t apply if you were her dream celebrity man, or someone she truly found attractive!

-Aaron P. Taylor

Note: The views and opinions expressed in this article do not necessarily reflect those of EMQTV, its network, or its affiliates.  They are the sole thoughts of its author, Aaron P. Taylor, who is more than happy to take credit for them…