The Whitney Houston Interview: When Will Women Stop Playing the “Victim” Role?

Before I go on my tangent here, let me just say for the record: I am a person that believes in taking responsibility for one’s own actions.  If I get involved in a situation that results in unwanted consequences that are damaging to me or others around me, I am always willing to take claim to any part I may have had in such actions, even if they resulted in me getting hurt.

With that said, I find it amazing that, in 2009, there are women out there that still play the “victim” role when it comes to their dealings with men who, from the start, showed themselves to be less than worthy for partnership.

I bring this up because Whitney Houston, the soul-stirring singer with the gifted voice who dominated the late 1980s/early 1990s music scene with her songs about love, recently did an interview with Oprah (as part of her promotional push for her newest #1 album, “I Look To You”) where she opened up about her life and – more importantly – her troublesome marriage with former “New Edition” heartthrob, Bobby Brown.

I read the interview online, knowing in advance what I’d probably hear from Ms. Houston in the article: how Bobby abused her; how he was jealous of her; the fights he would start with her, etc.  Meanwhile, she positioned herself as a woman who simply tried to love her man as strong as she could – even going so far as to use drugs with him (not because she was addicted to the drugs, but, says Whitney, “I was addicted to HIM.”) – and ended up in a downward spiral as a result.

Well, all I have to say to Ms. “I’m-Every-Woman” is this…

BRAVO!!! (Jumps out of seat and gives her a standing ovation)

Way to go, Whitney.  That has to be the BEST performance of playing a victim by a woman that I’ve seen or read in a LONG time.

You think that just because you put on your sad face and start spewing crap about how Bobby treated you SO badly, that I’m supposed to feel SORRY for you??

GET THE HECK OUTTA HERE!

I remember seeing a little show a few years ago called “Being Bobby Brown” – you know, the show that starred your former husband? The show that YOU appeared on quite often? Well, let me tell you something, Ms. Houston: I saw your appearances on that show, and if there is one thing I know, it’s that you were NOT the only victim on that show!

Granted, you both probably stopped wanting to be around each other a LONG time ago… but regardless, there were plenty of moments on that show where YOU – yes, YOU – were seen on camera:

• Insulting your husband
• Showing up to his “Male Bonding” activities when you had NO business being there
• Being a nag
• Being the starter of arguments and fights

The truth of the matter is, you all were BOTH on drugs; therefore, you were BOTH doing things to the other person that were harmful to their psyche and well-being. Furthermore, it’s not like Bobby Brown was hiding his “bad boy” ways from you or anybody before YOU made the conscious choice to marry him.

But of course, you’re a woman, so all the sympathy from your now-dissolved marriage will go YOUR way.  And frankly, it makes me SICK.

You know what the underlying theme is in our society today?  WOMEN ARE STILL THE WEAKER SEX.

I should note: this is not a view I personally hold.  I had a strong mother who was able to raise me and my brother with little male influence after my Dad died.  And she taught us that both men AND women have to own up to things when they’ve done stuff that’s wrong.

However, the general consensus in our society is that, between the two sexes, men are still the stronger sex.  Consequently, whenever a relationship between the two genders goes sour, it is always the “weak woman” who must be the victim in the situation, not the male counterpart.

Look at the recent divorce between Jon and Kate Gosselin from TLC’s “Jon and Kate Plus 8.”  Anyone who watched even ONE episode of that show can see how much of a biznich Kate was to Jon – she constantly put him down, emasculated him in front of his kids, treated him like a child, and always complained about how her way of raising the kids was better.

Yet when divorce time finally rolled around, who did the media turn into the “bad person?” That’s right, the male of the couple!  Good ol’ Jon Gosselin went from being the badgered Mr. Mom to the country-hopping party guy who’d rather spend time out with floozies than his own kids.  Meanwhile, Kate suddenly turned from being seen as a biznitch into a saintly mom who’s “holding strong” and “focusing her life on the well-being of her kids!”

AND IT’S NOT EVEN TRUE!

Above: A video for the song called “Kate Gosselin is a….” Well, ya know…

The only time Jon’s out “partying” – which he is legally free to do as a grown-ass man – is on days when it’s Kate’s days to have the kids and he’s not allowed around them.  What about the days when Jon IS taking care of the kids – no one asks two questions about where Kate has gone!

But again, because she’s of the “weaker” sex (again, in quotes because I don’t believe it to be true), Kate’s the victim, and Jon’s the sleazeball.  PLU-LEEEZE!

The bottom line is, women need to wake up and realize that continuing to play the victim role will only keep the view of them as the “weaker sex” a continuing issue in our society.  Yes, there are women who are victims to men who do horrible things to them… but to place every woman in the “victim” category is to do both themselves and REAL women victims a disservice.

And NO, Ms. Houston, I do NOT feel sorry for you.  I’m sure Oprah and the rest of her man-bashing, victim-loving crowd will be all but ready to point your entire spiraling downfall on your interaction with Mr. Brown, but this is ONE person who knows the REAL deal – and I ain’t fallin’ for it!

-Aaron P. Taylor

Twitter.com/APTsongs